There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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