Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
