Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
