Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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