Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
