a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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