Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
