Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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