If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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