Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
