But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
