Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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