I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
