After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
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