allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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