12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
