He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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