Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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