So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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