Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
