Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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