Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
