went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
