there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
