4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
