SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
honey bunches of taint.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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