rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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