Your tits are I can't wait for
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
