I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
