well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
You smell like stripper and shame
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
