ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
