Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
be right there i have to get my cape
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
