Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
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