I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
