i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
