five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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