yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize