I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Michael Bay diarrhea
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
