shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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