69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
