I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
