Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
