She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
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