How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
