i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
