Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
