id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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