i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
