does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
