there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
